Wayne Rooney needs to wake up and smell the coffee – before he drinks it to sober up!

England’s record goalscorer, who is attempting to overtake Peter Shilton’s 125 appearances for the Three Lions, has let himself down with his early-morning boozy antics.

The skipper should know better. He knows that, we know that – and that’s why he has publicly apologised for his conduct, after being invited to a wedding bash in the squad’s Hertfordshire hotel during the time interim boss Gareth Southgate had given the squad off between internationals.

Rooney is a living legend, but as captain of United and England has a wider remit; a responsibility to the game as a whole. Remarkably, FA staff were with bleary eyed Rooney – still in his England training kit – as he did an Elton John impersonation having a go on the piano. Sadly, they didn’t take this grown man off up to bed.

Well he’s facing the music now…sweating on whether Southgate will give him the opportunity to skipper or even play for the national side again. We don’t necessarily want our footballers to be saints, and some of the best such as George Best certainly were not, but times have changed. With everyone bar me forever taking photos of one another on mobile phones, it was obvious pictures of Rooney looking worse for wear would get into the papers!

Rooney (as he contemplates how he ended up front page news again) should think about how he compares with Ronaldo. They are of similar age, yet one looks after himself and is a fine specimen with a bronzed body that Mrs D compares with mine – while the other plays for United!

My advice to Rooney is use your loaf lad, and shape up, otherwise you’ll regret forever not making the most of the latter stages of your distinguished career. If Rooney gets over injury and Jose Mourinho is in a mood to let him answer his critics at Old Trafford against Arsenal in the dinner time kick off, he’s 11/2 at Betfred to score first. He’s got a couple of seasons left in him if he can change his ways…and I hope he does.

Meanwhile Pep Guardiola got me chuckling about early morning antics of a very different kind. The City boss has imposed a no-nookie after midnight rule for his players in a bid to boost performance and reduce injury risk on the pitch. How he’ll impose this rule I dread to think!

City, who have slipped to third in the Premier League behind Chelsea and Liverpool, are odds on favourites to win at Palace and remain clear favourites for the title. Especially knowing like we do that all the lads get themselves tucked up for some nice shut-eye, with limited hanky-panky…


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